Current emotion...

Here I am sitting in a sports bar having a Guiness, trying to relax myself while having a cold drink. There's a lot on my mind, not anything I want to think about.

On one hand, I'm being seen as a liar and one that is dishonest, and on the other hand, I'm supposed to be this sweet person. Isn't that a contrast? :). Are any of those perceptions correct? Only one person can truly tell, me. Do I know? Not sure. Is it that I am unstable? Confused...well, I know I am. Dishonest? Are these things innate? Does doing something once makes it apart of you? Is it that memories never die and so once a person remembers something about you, they think that same thing of you? What is it?

I hope I don't become like my father.

Sadness is what it is now. With time though, it shall fade. When where is true happiness? Can a person truly have that? If so, I want it.